The Your Problem Now Club:
Wickedly Funny Stories on Divorce and Midlife Dating
by Josie Garrett
Available Now in Paperback and for Amazon Kindle!
The Bolt: Josie attends a college graduation party and is allowed to inspect a man's penis to determine if he really does have a bolt through the shaft.
Socks for Celebrities: Josie thinks all feet are disgusting so her million-dollar idea is to create a sticker book of socks to place over the feet of famous people that appear in magazines.
Welcome to the "Your Problem Now" Club: Josie decides to start a worldwide club for divorced women called "The Your Problem Now Club." It is for women that are thrilled to hand off their ex-husbands to someone else.
Your New Husband: A User's Manual: "The Your Problem Now Club" is devoted to humanitarian efforts such as having members write user's manuals for their ex-husbands' new wives. In the spirit of leadership, Josie writes the very first user's manual for her ex-husband's new wife.
A Public Service Announcement: Josie passes along some valuable information to divorced women that are once again dating and experiencing occasional rejection.
Naked and Stupid: Josie continues to live by her number one rule in life: She never makes love to a man that is smarter than she is.
Dating Older Men: Josie explains why she prefers dating men that are older than her.
Yoo Hoo!: Josie has a panic attack and nearly falls out of a window when she and David discover an unexpected and unwanted visitor at his back door early one morning.
Two Popsicle Sticks and Duct Tape: Just how much intimacy can a man take? Apparently much less than he thought he could.
Grifters: If Josie doesn't like police officers, why is she having dreams about one?
Against the Laws of Nature: Josie's friend Anna wants to tell her everything about her new lover and Josie is all ears until she learns the guy is thirty years younger than Anna.
"Watch This": Josie is horrified when her friend Nicholas wants her to tell a new friend that she is very likely to be the most gifted manipulator he will run across outside of a state prison.
Dating Men Without Children: If you have children, should you consider dating men that don't have children? The short answer is no.
What We Stand On: Josie goes to a Civil War Reenactment and is traumatized by a man that is rubbing his nasty bare feet in the grass. In front of children no less!
Hello Celibacy: Josie balks at having an IUD put in and decides that becoming celibate is the solution to the problems of birth control and life-consuming lovers.
The Housewifery Virus: Josie believes that women like to cook for their husbands because nature has equipped the male ejaculate with a pathogen that she calls THE HOUSEWIFERY VIRUS.
The R.O.M.E.O. Brigade: Rich Old Men Eating Out. Josie learns of a subgroup of desirable customers that everyone wants to date and when one of these men sets his sights on Josie, she learns that some people are not what they first appear to be.
On Paper: Deciding if a man is worth your time? Remember that what looks good on paper may not be good in real life.
The Perfectly Bad Date: Josie takes you through the worst date of her life.
Rules of Engagement: Josie's set of rules that protect women who insist on being the mistresses of married or otherwise involved men.
Why I Don't Date Younger Men: Josie chases away a young man looking to have a fling with an older woman.
Don't Make The Same Mistake Twice: Some women date the same kind of man that they just divorced. Here's how to break the pattern and find a different type of man... a man that you can be happy with.
How to Prevent a Divorce: Josie conducts a poll asking recently divorced men to tell her what their ex-wives could have done to prevent their divorce. Stop laughing.
Advice for Men: It's short and sweet ladies...
Missing The Woman Chip: Josie's youngest son is horrified when she is asked to be an online advice columnist for recently divorced women that have just begun dating again.
The Third Date Rule: Sure, when you're twenty-two and all firm and your tits have yet to sag, sex on the third date is an exciting milestone to look forward to. When you're forty-two or sixty-two, not so much. Maybe wait until later, when everyone is sure that they will love each other, no matter what they find under the sweater.
The "Little Time Left" Dating App: Josie sets up a fake profile on a dating site for older people that don't have much time left and are tired of the long-winded dating games that younger people play.
The Your Problem Now Club Chapter Summaries
_I recently talked to a number of divorced men that had initiated their divorces and I asked them to tell me what their ex-wives could have done to prevent the end of their marriages.
___Most of these men had several reasons for divorcing their wives, but I chose only one reason per man to present to you because the massive amounts of their bullshit were making me sick and I didn’t want to pass that on.
Read a Sample Chapter - "How to Prevent a Divorce"
The Your Problem Now Club
"How to Prevent a Divorce"
While Josie's first book, The 10th Anniversary of My Divorce dealt with the breakup of her marriage, the divorce process itself and becoming a single parent, The Your Problem Now Club focuses on Josie's experiences with dating men that other women have ALREADY divorced, dodging desperate marriage proposals and eventually deciding to become celibate (for now). Includes the riotously funny "The Your Problem Now Club" and the slightly mean-spirited, but ever-popular "Your New Husband: A User's Manual."